Sunday, April 8, 2012

He is Risen! He is Risen indeed!

As I'm writing this, I am sitting in my friend Ashely's kitchen in Edinburgh, Scotland. I look out the window and see not a cloudy sky (which is the case in Scotland most days) but the sun shining through and brightening the world below. Kind of appropriate considering today is Easter. I guess it just goes to show how wonderful God can truly be. As I was getting ready for the day, I found that I just kept staring out the window still in awe of the fact that the sun was shining. I wish I had words that could begin to describe how I am feeling. I feel beyond blessed that God did these things for me so that I could live forever with him. I'm trying really hard not to sound "preachy" but I'm not sure if I can help it right now. Yesterday Ashley took me to her church where they were having this Easter Labyrinth and I must say it was exactly the type of thing I needed. When she first said Labyrinth the first thing that came to my mind was Pan's Labyrinth. You know that creepy movie with all those mysterious creatures and I honestly don't have the slightest clue what that movie is even about. Anyways, I've gotten off topic enough. We entered the church and there was a path of rocks and tea lights showing us the way and subtle music playing in the background. The first thing we were asked to do was take off our shoes because the ground we were on was holy ground. Any opportunity for me to take off my shoes is most welcomed and I understood that it truly was holy ground we were treading on. As I wander through the labyrinth, I couldn't help but be overcome with this feeling of peace and joy and the sense of being loved. The whole experience was incredible, but I think the part that stands out the most, well the parts really was the recreation of the last supper and the garden of Gethsemane. There was a table set up on the alter where we were invited to sit and eat some bread, drink some wine and reflect on how Jesus might have felt at this point and just pray. You would think that me spending a year over here as a Young Adult in Global Mission that I would have sat and prayed a lot this year, but as I was sitting there I realized that this had not been the case. I don't know why, but I came to the conclusion while sitting there that I had begun to lose sight of God and my relationship with Him. I started to feel incredibly guilty and ashamed of myself a little bit. I didn't understand how it had happened and why I had let it, but I knew that I needed to regain my relationship with God. After I left the table and continued on, I came to the garden. The space literally looked like a garden. There were two grass paths leading up to these potted flowers. As I got closer I saw that there was a sign asking people to plant a flower and recommit their lives to Christ. The timing could not have been better. I stood there for a few minutes and wrestled with myself. I thought, who am I to deserve His love? What have I done with my life that would make me worthy of such a great love? The great thing is there is nothing I can ever do to warrant God's love. He loves me and each one of us as we are; there are no conditions to His love. This thought to me is both amazingly beautiful and incredibly terrifying. This time of Easter is a chance for us to remember, in a big way, the love that God has for us. "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten Son that all who believe in Him shall not perish, but have eternal life." (John 3:16) And as I planted my flower, I told God that I'm sorry for turning away and that I need Him more than I will ever be able to express. I opened the door back to let Him back in to my life. I know it's not going to be easy to trust Him fully, but I know that I can't do it all on my own. I know this blog has just been a big ramble, but I feel like it needed to be said. Through out the labyrinth I had with me a red ribbon. We were told to carry the ribbon with us through out our experience. At the finish, there was a cross and we added our ribbons to the cross. Before we tied our ribbons, we could write a word or phrase that we thought about through out the journey. The words that came to my mind were unconditional love. I hope that during this Easter celebration we can all remember that God does indeed love us unconditionally. May you all have a blessed Easter.